1. Your diet consists mainly of chili cheese nachos, sunflower seeds and pop.
2. You're pretty sure you live in a house, you just can't remember what it looks like or where it is.
3. You see absolutely nothing wrong with bribing your daughter with money, as long as she's having fun.
4. You participate frequently in the "pace back and forth while mumbling incessantly" ritual.
5. The coaches have no idea what they're doing or how to run a team...you could do better.
6. Your daughter has not only improved her softball skills, she's also become particularly good at rolling her eyes at you.
7. The phrase "we're taking a family vacation" translates to "this weekend's softball tournament is really far away , so pack your suitcase."
8. Somehow, your minivan has been turned into a softball equipment storage facility.
9. Your wallet is empty and your skin in burnt , but all you wanna know is "what's the score?"
10. Family gatherings and holidays are scheduled around softball practice and games.
11. Your kid is the best player on the team and should play every position on the field at the same time.
12. You have peculiar round bruises all over your body.
13. All of your white clothes are now a dingy shade of brown.
14. You refuse to go anywhere without your foldout chair, portable grill, ice chest, and a roll of toilet paper (just in case).
15. Blue used to be your favorite color- now your favorite phrase to yell out is: "You stink, Blue!"
